I work at Something Tattoo at Amiralsgatan 10 in Malmö, Sweden. I take swish (preferred), cards (costs an extra 50kr), or cash. Please eat at least a little something before you arrive. You may bring a friend to your appointment, but please keep it to only one friend because our shop gets crowded very quickly. 🙂
Q: How do I book with you?
A: There are a few little steps that are as follows:
- Read ALL the info on this page
- Add firstname.lastname@example.org to your email contacts (I sometimes get sorted as spam, which is the story of my life)
- Fill out this form!
- I’ll email you with a calendar that you select a slot from. I do all the bookings myself, so it can take up to 14 days for me to respond to your request. But after that, you’re booked in!
- You come and get your tattoo!
Note: I don’t generally send out sketches before appointments- it’s better to look at the design together. I normally start working on sketches a week before appointment time, but it varies a lot.
Q: How much does it cost?
A: My minimum is 1500sek, which is also my hourly rate. My tattoos never cost less than 1500sek and rarely more than 5000sek. This includes rent, supplies, and tax, which is altogether about 70% of what you give me (WT actual F). This also includes the time I spend drawing and communicating. In other words, no, I’m not actually making 1500kr an hour. 1500kr can seem a little steep but the majority of my tattoos take under an hour because they’re often simple and small, so I have to charge that to make a decent living. Keep in mind that a tattoo is an investment that lasts for a long long time. If you’re willing to buy a pair of shoes that will last you a year for 1500sek, then you should be willing to pay for a decent tattoo that will last you til you be dead. I know it can be a lot of money for some people, but I really can’t afford to charge less unfortunately. Sorry!
Q: How long does it take?
A: Absolutely impossible to say for sure. I can give estimates but everyone’s skin is different and it depends on size and placement etc. Please add about 30-45 minutes for setting up, cleaning your skin, etc. Ie, don’t expect to be in and out like clockwork. I hate being stressed for time! That being said, I don’t bill you for time spent drawing. I normally start the clock when we begin putting the stencil on and stop the clock after I apply the bandage. If we get interrupted, I deduct a bit of time. That being said, there’s no actual clock… 🙂
Q: Can you do this tattoo on me ridiculously small and really detailed?
A: No. You can suggest a general size but I have to make sure the tattoo will age well so I reserve the right to choose the right size for the design. I don’t do micro-tattoos (there are people who specialise in that). It’s wise for you to listen to my advice- I also want your tattoo to look as good as possible for as long as possible.
Q: You did this tattoo on someone. Can you do it on me too?
A: Probably not. I generally only do tattoos once. Some of them I do again and again, but very few. Otherwise my job gets boring af and it’s mean to those who already have the design.
Q: What if I want to cancel?
A: Just don’t… But if you have to, please do so well in advance so I don’t lose my income for the day. If you cancel within 48 hours of your appointment, I ask you pay for for half an hour (750kr). Within 24 hours, I ask you pay for a full hour (1500kr) via Paypal or Swish. This is not just to be a douche, it’s a real hassle to rebook things at the last minute and it makes me feel very depressed and useless. If you have requested a custom drawing and you cancel after I have made your drawing, I ask you pay 750kr. I normally start working on things a week before the appointment. I don’t take deposits cause that’s just a bother for both of us, but since this is my only source of income, I need to be able to cover my costs and try to predict how much money I’ll have at the end of each month. I’m a sole trader and I don’t have any holiday pay or sick leave. If you’re sick, maybe you still get paid, but if you’re sick and you cancel with me at the last minute, I certainly don’t get paid by your workplace… anyway, boohoo boohoo, but really, please don’t be a shite.
Q: Do you speak Swedish?
A: I understand that gobledygook but I won’t speak it because I’m shy and a coward.<<
Q: Can I use your design and get someone else to tattoo them on me?
A: No. This is my work, and I need to make money off it. I also design a lot of stuff specifically for each customer, and it’s not fair to them. I do simple line drawings anyway- I’m sure you can just do your own or get someone near you to draw something unique. It’s more fun and then I won’t have a fit!
Q: Are you going to visit ______ soon?
A: I always announce if I’m going to travel somewhere! If you follow me, you’ll know, I promise, cause I won’t shut up about it!
Q: What needles do you use?
A: It always depends on what I’m working on. You wouldn’t use a fat sharpie to draw a delicate flower. You get the point… I can’t really offer advice on hand poking because I’m self-taught and I don’t feel comfortable sharing something that’s so personal/might be wrong. My whole leg is covered in absolute garbage that I tattooed on myself… That’s how I learned. You have to do the same. Besides, you can’t really explain how to do it in words.
I normally apply a thin sheet of sticky plastic to the tattoo after I finish. This will fill with fluids like ink and plasma from the fresh tattoo. Keep it on for around 2 days (at least 6 hours, nor more than 3 days). You can shower with the plastic thing on. If it starts falling off or leaking, just peel it off completely. When you remove the plastic, wash the tattoo with your bare clean hands, luke warm water, and mild soap (nothing abrasive). Pat dry with toilet paper. Try to wash it once a day or every two days at least. You can shower with a new tattoo but try to keep the showers short and cool for the first two weeks. Don’t take a bath or whatever. The idea is that you’re going to get a dry scab and you want to keep that on as long as possible. That means no scratching, no picking at it, no fucking around, no dragging a towel across it. If it’s really bad, you can slap it, but try not to be too rough. If you’re really uncomfortable or you notice the scab cracking a lot, you can apply some mild unscented moisturiser. Nothing the seals it like petroleum jelly- only mild basic moisturiser. Helosan works well. Don’t over do it with the cream- you don’t want it all swampy.. max 2 times a day. You can drink after your tattoo.. who the fuck cares and plus you’re a bad ass now, so…